Like a lot of people these days I spend a bit too much time logged in to Facebook. Sadly it seems that most people have boring status updates leaving me little to read. Personally I like to try and amuse my family and friends with funny or clever Facebook status messages.

I try and come up with original clever Facebook status messages on my own but sometimes I get a bit of writers block and search the web for something clever to post. There are a slew of websites that posts collections of Facebook (or MySpace) status messages for people to use.

Below are a few Facebook status messages that I’ve used and are, at least in my opinion, clever.

• …’s career as a psychic ended due to unforeseen circumstances.
• …says Lycopersicon esculentum, when you say tomato.
• …’s creative juices may contain pulp.
• … thinks rock is dead. And paper killed it!
• … just heard that they are removing the word “gullible” from the dictionary!